I believe the viewing of pornography should be cut down. Not as a religious or moral issue of right and wrong, but because of the effects it can have. With the internet, pornography is readily accessible, anonymously and for free. For our age group (especially for males) spending hours every week viewing porn is common. Watching pornography can change male-female relationships and sexual interactions and this is especially harmful for those just beginning to fully discover their sexual potential. Seeing nudity and sexual acts too frequently causes tolerance to be built up and more and more stimulation is needed in order to be turned on. Images and scenes that used to be exhilarating lose their excitement over time and higher levels of intensity are required. This causes people not only to seek out more and more intense pornography but also to be bored with sex with their partner.
Frequently masturbating to pornography can cause viewers to stop associating an orgasm with their partner (and their partners kiss, smell, or body) and begin to associate it with the images they are seeing on the screen. Many people start visualizing images from porn during actual sexual intercourse with their partner to increase their sexual excitement. But this causes the person not to be in the moment and destroys the connection between two people. For some men, it can actually become very difficult to achieve and maintain an erection or have an orgasm without visualizing porn. Porn also hurts relationships as it destroys trust because people try to hide their porn watching from their partner. Most people only have a certain amount of sexual desire and energy and rather than porn adding to the desire, it actually uses it up. People who do find out about the porn watching (and especially those who actually choose porn over sex) often feel betrayed as if the person was cheating on them. Porn watching can even develop into a full-blown addiction for some people.
Internet pornography creates unrealistic expectations of sex for many young people. In one study participants who viewed lots of porn reported less satisfaction with their intimate partner’s affection, physical appearance, sexual curiosity, and sexual performance. People often internalize what they are seeing on the screen and believe that is what sex is really like. Young people are learning what sex is, how it looks, and how they should act during it from pornography. In porn, women are screaming ecstatically (even during anal penetration), want sex at all times, and want exactly what the man wants. People who watch lots of porn tend to not put effort into foreplay or pleasing the other person because of what they see in porn. Women in porn videos are often shown as submissive and man-centered and do not have thoughts and needs of their own, this also causes many viewers to see women increasingly as sex objects. Because of porn, more women feel they have to have anal sex or let a guy ejaculate on their face in order to measure up. Many females feel they cannot compare physically to porn stars with full makeup, perfect bodies, fake tans, fake breasts and no pubic hair. For many men, the expectations of what a woman should look like grows too high to be fulfilled by an actual woman. They are less and less satisfied by their options of real people to date.
Sadly, viewing sex on the internet makes it more difficult to interact with real people and causes decreased intimacy and increased loneliness. Sex in pornography does not show the buildup of getting to know someone, developing a connection, and at some point needing to be as close as physically possible. It is only the physical act of having sex. Pornography plays into sexual intercourse going from making love to fucking. I do not think it is possible or appropriate for all of what is on the internet to be censored. Instead, I think each person should make a personal choice to limit pornography consumption for themselves and their current or future partners.
I agree with this blog completely. I think that Kate has really good ideas about how pornography can take away from real relationships. She mentions that in reality it is not like the way pron makes sexual intercourse to be. This is so true and I find that guys watch porn way too much. The part about how women are viewed just as sex objects is also a good point in this blog. The way porn stars look is so fake and they are male dominated in all the videos. The sexual intimacy between partners must not be as exicting if they are always watching the narcissitic pleasures portrayed in porn. Kate clearly adresses all the negative consequences of viewing sex over the internet. Women do feel the need to try more unusual things because guys are constantly trying to re-create unrealistic fantasies that porn puts in their head. I agree with the stance she took that its a personal choice and it would best benefit couples to care about their future partners viewing or addiction in pornography.
ReplyDeleteCarina Melanson
From Emily Jacobs
ReplyDeleteThis was so thorough and I agree completely. I particularly agree on the details you provided about pornography effecting the expectations men have for women. It is completely unrealistic for society to expect women to have perfectly flat stomachs, small hips, a shapely butt, no fat on their thighs, and huge breasts. The same problem applies to heterosexual women who view pornography, because sorry people, but most penises are not that big. If pornography did not heighten peoples expectations of what the human body should look like, sexual relations would be better off. If people did not expect ridiculously perfect partners, the endorphins they create would naturally distract them from the imperfections because they would be more focused on the pleasure being provided by sex.
I think it's interesting that you mention how excessive pornography viewing can teach a person to associate orgasms with the pornography and masturbation, rather than their partner. I agree with this point-of-view and aside from limiting personal consumption of porn viewing, I think it would also help for couples to watch porn together, should they enjoy it too much to give up. I think that it would promote couples to discuss things they like/dislike/want to experiment with/are uninterested in trying. The more communication that happens between partners, the stronger their bond is likely to be.
To Kate from Hai
ReplyDeleteI do agree with many of the statements Kate said but I believe that these are mainly general statements about what porn can do to a relationship. I noticed that Kate used the words , "Frequently", "Many", "For some men", "Most people", and "many young people", and all of these target the majority of people who watch porn. If Kate is arguing that porn CAN ruin relationships and that all these things MAY happen, then I agree but I disagree that porn should be limited and that many men are unable to please their mate. All these statements are not facts but more generalizations. Most men do not watch porn excessively if they are having sexual intercourse with their partner. Most men watch porn when they can't have sex and don't have a partner to do it with. Porn can actually be used to enhance a couple's sexual relationship by experiencing new things. Some couples watch porn together because it turns them on.
I disagree with Kate when she says, "Frequently masturbating to pornography can cause viewers to stop associating an orgasm with their partner (and their partners kiss, smell, or body) and begin to associate it with the images they are seeing on the screen". I am not going to lie, but I have masturbated to pornography and I'm sure that almost every guy after they hit puberty, do the same but that doesn't mean, I am unable to give my partner an orgasm. I know that sex isn't just fucking like it is portrayed in pornography. The majority of pornography doesn't show foreplay and the guy trying to please the woman with his kisses and touch.
I think that when men envision images of pornstars during sex with their partner, choose porn over sex, can't keep an erection, or can't have an orgasm, this is something much more serious and they need help. Maybe the reasons why they have all of these is because sex with their partner isn't good?
When Kate said, "Most people only have a certain amount of sexual desire and energy and rather than porn adding to the desire, it actually uses it up", I think it's because when men masturbate and ejaculate to porn, their sexual desire is fulfilled and therefore they don't want sex.
The part about women thinking it's cheating when men watch porn is absurd. Cheating is when the man engages in sexual intercourse with another woman physically. Watching another woman have sex with another man is not cheating.
The reason why women "scream ecstatically" is because porn is made for entertainment. It is a fake orgasm and though everyone can tell it's fake, we all know it wouldn't sell as much money if the woman was silent. The whole body image of the woman being perfect relates to the media portraying skinny models, women, and even the barbie doll. This is seen everywhere. Women also have an image of men and expect them to be strong, lean, muscular, fit, and more.
Men are not the only ones that watch porn, women watch porn also but don't speak as openly about it as men do.